Why Does My Mind Go Blank In Conversations?
Most of us have experienced a moment when our mind went blank during a conversation, leaving us feeling awkward and uncomfortable. This phenomenon might occur due to stress, anxiety, or just because we are not very comfortable talking to someone.
If your mind goes blank during conversations, the best thing to do is take a pause and count to three. This will help you remain calm and collected, and give you enough time before resuming the conversation.
Another effective way of dealing with a blank mind during conversations is by asking questions. Not only will it show that you are interested in what the other person has to say, but it will also help you get some clarity when your mind is blank.
Ensuring you are well prepared for conversations beforehand can also help prevent the mind from going blank during a conversation. Doing basic research on the topic of discussion and having an open mind will ensure that there is something to talk about even if your mind goes blank.
It can be frustrating when we forget a word, forget an idea, or draw a complete blank. However, it is not uncommon, and it doesn’t have to be the end of the conversation. In this post, we will share some tips on what to do when your mind goes blank during the conversation.
Take a Deep Breath and Stay Calm
When you start to feel that your mind is going blank, it’s essential to take a deep breath and try to calm down. Take a moment to focus on your breath and remain relaxed. This could prevent you from panicking and feeling even more flustered. It can also help you refocus and regain composure.
Ask Them to Repeat or Explain
If you cannot remember something during the conversation, don’t be afraid to ask them to repeat or explain. You don’t have to guess or fake it. Instead, ask for clarification or ask if you can come back to that point later. It’s better to be honest than to pretend you know what you don’t.
Pause and Collect Your Thoughts
There’s no shame in taking a pause to collect your thoughts. Sometimes we need a moment to reflect, gather our ideas, and find the right words to express them. It’s perfectly fine to take a brief pause to gather your thoughts and dive back in when you feel more comfortable.
Focus on the Conversation, Not Yourself
One of the major reasons people go blank during conversation is because they are too focused on themselves. They are thinking about how they look or how to say something right. Instead, try and focus on listening to the other person. This can help you to relax, feel more engaged in the conversation, and distract your mind from the sense of panic.
Don’t Let It Stop You from Continuing the Conversation
Remember that it’s okay to forget a thought or lose track of the conversation thread for a moment. It happens to everyone! But don’t let that change the dynamic of the conversation and make you feel disconnected. You can always acknowledge it, apologize, and continue talking. A good listener will understand.
Repeat the Last Word
When your mind is blank, it can be difficult to think of a whole sentence, but sometimes a single word can help. Repeating the last word your conversation partner said can give you a few moments to think of a response. It also shows that you were listening and engaged in the conversation.
Use the Environment Around You
In times of struggle, look to what is right in front of you to come up with new things to talk about. If you’re in a coffee shop, you can comment about the drink they’re having or the atmosphere of the place. If you’re in a park, you can ask them if they have been there before or explore other areas of interest around the city that you haven’t visited. Mention a funny sign around the area or a view you’re both able to see.
Employ the Power of Observation
If you still can’t find anything to say, start observing your environment more closely. Point out something that catches your eye or talk about the weather. It’s not only a way to carry on the conversation but it can also be a way to combat any uncomfortable silence. Undoubtedly, you found the surrounding intriguing, therefore, there’s always something to tally about related to it.
Don’t Be Afraid to Laugh at Yourself
If none of the above suggestions work, it may be time to admit defeat – sometimes silence is okay. It’s a natural occurrence and could even lead to a laugh and an inside joke with the person you’re talking to. People appreciate those who can laugh at themselves and being vulnerable. You can always try to continue the conversation once your mind is clear. Sometimes it even leads to the person you’re speaking to to share their own blank moments in conversation, creating an open and friendly atmosphere.
Ask a Thought-Provoking Question
One way to keep the conversation moving is to ask a question that is both unique and thought-provoking. It could be something like, “If you could go back in time and have a conversation with anyone, who would it be and why?” or “What is one book that has had a significant impact on your life?” These questions can help spark an interesting conversation and show that you are genuinely interested in the other person’s thoughts and opinions.
How to Double Your Social Confidence in 5 Minutes"
Check out this free training offered by the experts at Social Self!
- How to use "Conversational Threading" to avoid awkward silence
- The proven way to get past boring small talk
- Instantly beat self-consciousness with the "OFC-method"
- Busting the myth that you have to get a "more interesting life" to be more interesting"
Share a Random Fact
If you’re struggling to come up with something to say, why not share a random fact? This will not only get the conversation going again, but it can also spark some interesting discussion. For example, “Did you know that a group of flamingos is called a flamboyance?” or “Do you know why we say ‘break a leg’ for good luck?”
Share a Personal Story
Sometimes the best way to maintain a conversation is to share a personal story that is related to the topic at hand. It could be a funny anecdote or a more serious experience that taught you something valuable. By sharing a personal story, you allow the other person to get to know you better and can help continue the conversation on a deeper level.
Talk About Your Passions or Hobbies
Sharing your passions or hobbies can be an excellent conversation topic, especially if they are unusual or unique. It could be anything from a fascination with astrophysics to a love of extreme sports. By discussing these topics, you allow the other person to see a different side of you, and it can also lead to discovering common interests that you may not have known you had.
Play a Game
If you find yourself at a loss for words, why not try playing a game? It doesn’t have to be a traditional board game or card game. It could be something like “21 Questions” or “Two Truths and a Lie” that can help break the ice and get the conversation flowing in a fun and relaxed way.
Have a Few Topics in Mind
If you know you’re going to be in a social situation where you might feel anxious, it can be helpful to have a few conversation topics in mind before you go. You could make a mental list of things you want to ask the other person about, or things you want to share about yourself. This can help you feel more prepared and confident going into the conversation.
Be Honest
If all else fails, just be honest. Admit that you’re struggling to come up with a response and maybe even ask for clarification on what the person meant. Being vulnerable can often lead to deeper conversations and show that you’re comfortable enough with the person to be honest.
Take a Break
Finally, if you still find yourself struggling to come up with things to say, it’s okay to take a break. Excuse yourself to the bathroom or get a drink. Take a moment to collect your thoughts and come up with new conversation topics or questions. Sometimes a short break is all it takes to refresh your mind and get the conversation back on track.
Listen Actively
Being present and listening carefully helps you connect the dots and make connections between different topics. It’s not just about waiting for your turn to speak but genuinely trying to understand and appreciate what the other person is saying.
Expand on Topics
Whenever someone brings up a topic, try to expand on it. Ask questions, elaborate on ideas, and relate it to other areas you might know. Doing so will help you engage others, find common ground, and build deeper connections.
Ask Follow-up Questions
One of the secrets of conversational threading is to take something that someone has said and ask a follow-up question. This shows that you’re genuinely interested in their perspective, and it encourages them to keep talking.
Share Information
If you have something to contribute to the conversation that’s related to the current topic, share it. It may help others to learn something new or spark further discussion. Just be sure to keep the information relevant and interesting.
Engage Your Curiosity
Flow state is often associated with a sense of curiosity and exploration. When you approach a conversation with genuine curiosity, you are more likely to be present and engaged, making it easier to tap into the flow of conversation. Ask open-ended questions, seek different perspectives, and explore topics in depth to help stimulate your curiosity and deepen your connection with the other person.
Cultivate Mindfulness
Finally, cultivating mindfulness is an essential aspect of achieving flow state during conversation. Mindfulness involves being fully engaged in the present moment, focusing on your breath and sensations to help you stay present and centered. Incorporating mindfulness practices like meditation or yoga into your daily routine can help you develop the skills needed to remain focused and present during conversation, making it easier to achieve flow state.
Establish Rapport
Building a rapport with the person you’re talking to can help you get into the flow state quicker. Rapport is the connection or bond between two people, and it can be established in many ways. One way to establish rapport is to find common ground and connect on a personal level. Ask them about their interests, hobbies, or any commonalities you might share. Once you establish rapport, it’s easier to build off each other’s energy and become more invested in the conversation.
Let Go of Distractions
Lastly, letting go of distractions is vital to getting into the flow state. Distractions can come in many forms, such as negative emotions, intrusive thoughts, or physical discomfort. When you let go of distractions, you allow yourself to immerse fully in the conversation and tap into the flow state. If you find yourself growing distracted, take a deep breath, and refocus your attention on the conversation.
Going blank during a conversation doesn’t have to be a big deal. We all lose our train of thought from time to time. Rather than letting it derail the conversation, try to stay calm, ask for clarification, pause, focus on listening, and keep the conversation flowing. By using these techniques, you’ll be able to save the conversation and continue on as if nothing happened. Remember, the more you practice, the easier it becomes.
Related Posts About Making Conversation
WANT TO REMEMBER THIS? SAVE WHAT TO DO WHEN YOUR MIND GOES BLANK DURING CONVERSATION TO YOUR FAVORITE PINTEREST BOARD!
What to Do If Your Mind Goes Blank During Conversation
Here are some of my favorite social anxiety tools
Thanks for reading! I hope you found some helpful tips. Since this site is about social anxiety, I wanted to also share some tools I use that I hope you’ll find helpful. Some of these are affiliate links, so if you decide to try them, I’ll earn a commission. However, I only recommend things I have used myself and would recommend to a friend or family member.
Social Anxiety Masterclass: The Social Anxiety Masterclass is my signature course where I walk you through everything I know about how to manage social anxiety.
Audible Subscription: I recommend a lot of self-help books on this site, but I actually prefer an audiobook subscription over print books! My favorite subscription service is Audible because it has all the best-sellers and they stay in your digital library forever (even if you end your subscription). You can sign up for a free trial and listen to your first two books for free.
Online Therapy: For online therapy, I have personally used and like the service offered by Betterhelp. It's easy to get started from the comfort of your home. You'll even get a discount on your first month of therapy when you use my link.
Leave a Reply